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Fwd: Joke Of The Day November 25, 1999
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From: "Joke Of The Day" <funnyjokes-subscribe@listbot.com>
To: List Member <steel77@hotmail.com>
Subject: Joke Of The Day November 25, 1999
Date: Thu, 25 Nov 1999 20:31:34 -0800
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Joke Of The Day November 25, 1999
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JOKE OF THE DAY
Today is Thursday, November 25, 1999
The CEO of Tyson Foods manages to arrange a meeting with
the Pope at the Vatican.
After receiving the papal blessing, the CEO whispers, "Your
eminence, we have an offer for you. Tyson Foods is prepared
to donate $100 million dollars to the church if you change the
Lord's Prayer from 'give us this day our daily bread' to 'give
us this day our daily chicken.'
The Pope replies, "That is impossible. The Prayer is the word
of the Lord - it must not be changed."
"Well," says the Tyson CEO, "we anticipated your reluctance.
For this reason, we will increase our offer to $300 million
dollars if you change the Lord's Prayer from 'give us this day
our daily bread' to 'give us this day our daily chicken.'
Again, the Pope replies, "That, my son, is impossible. The
Prayer is the word of the Lord and it must not be changed."
Finally, the Tyson CEO says, "Your Holiness, we at Tyson
Foods respect your adherence to your faith, but we do have
one final offer. We will donate $500 million dollars - that's
half a billion dollars - to the great Catholic Church if you
change the Lord's Prayer from 'give us this day our daily
bread' to 'give us this day our daily chicken.'"
The Tyson CEO turns to leave and says, "Please consider
our final offer and let me know by week's end."
The next day, the Pope convenes the College of Cardinals.
"There is some good news, and there is some bad news,
he announces. "The good news is that the Church has
come into $500 million dollars."
"And the bad news, your eminence?" asks a Cardinal.
"We're losing the Wonderbread account."
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Eleven people were clinging precariously to a wildly swinging
rope suspended from a crumbling outcropping on Mount
Everest. Ten were blonde, one was a brunette.
As a group, they decided that one of the party should let go.
Otherwise, the rope would break and everyone would perish.
For an agonizing few moments no one volunteered.
Finally, the brunette gave a truly touching speech, saying
she would sacrifice herself to save the lives of the others.
The ten blondes applauded.
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Joke Of The Day November 25, 1999
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