[humorix] Microsoft warns of Y2.001K problem

[James Baughn <jbaughn@ldd.net>]

Microsoft warns of Y2.001K problem
Bernhard Rosenkraenzer, bero@redhat.de
January 3, 2000

REDMOND, WA -- Bill Gates, the World's Richest Man(tm),
boasted today "I told you so!" at a press conference about
his prediction that a Y2K-induced collapse of civilization
would not occur. While several million Windows-based PCs
did crash during the first minute of January 1st, 19100,
Bill Gates stated that it was "entirely coincidental" and
"had absolutely nothing to do with Y2K".  "However,"
Chairman Gates warned, "now that we've weathered Y2K, we
need to focus on Y2.001K, which could be a much larger
problem."

Microsoft spokesperson L. I. Arr explained, "Computers
might have serious problems getting into Y2.001K. Due to
the algorighms used to calculate the next year, the system
clock might just go back from 12/31/00 to 01/01/00, because
00 multiplied by anything is still 00. At the time some of
our innovative software solutions were written (such as
Windows 98), we predicted that 99.9% of the population
would have already upgraded to Windows 2000 by the time
Y2.001 rolled around.  In order to keep on track, we need
to warn people about the dangers of Y2.001K-related
failures in the hopes they will upgrade to Windows 2000."

Big companies and governmental institutions have already
started paying Microsoft to check their systems for Y2.001K
compliance.  In addition, Microsoft Marketing
(http://www.fud.microsoft.com/) issued a press release
warning that Unix, BeOS, and Macintosh systems might be
affected by Y2.001K and recommended that users of those
platforms upgrade to Windows 2000 when it arrives in
February (maybe).
-
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