humor: jun 11 -- How to Build a Web Page

[Nick Brown <nbrown@polymail.cpunix.calpoly.edu>]

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                              Nick's G-Rated Humor List
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I got this from Good Clean Fun
	-- web site http://www.slonet.org/~tellswor/
And they got it from Kitty's Daily Mews.
	-- web site http://www.katscratch.com
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    How to Build a Web Page
   In 25 (or more) Easy Steps
================================

1. Download a piece of Web authoring software - 20 minutes.

2. Think about what you want to write on your Web page - 6 weeks.

3. Download the same piece of Web authoring software,
   because they have released 3 new versions since the
   first time you downloaded it - 20 minutes.

4. Decide to just steal some images and awards to put on
   your site - 1 minute.

5. Visit sites to find images and awards, find 5 of them
   that you like - 4 days.

6. Run setup of your Web authoring software. After it fails,
   download it again - 25 minutes.

7. Run setup again, boot the software, click all toolbar buttons
   to see what they do - 15 minutes.

8. View the source of others' pages, steal some, change a few words
   here and there - 4 hours.

9. Preview your Web page using the Web Authoring software - 1 minute.

10. Try to horizontally line up two related images - 6 hours.

11. Remove one of the images - 10 seconds.

12. Set the text's font color to the same color as your background,
    wonder why all your text is gone - 4 hours.

13. Download a counter from your ISP - 4 minutes.

14. Try to figure out why your counter reads "You are visitor
    number -16.3E10" - 3 hours.

15. Put 4 blank lines between two lines of text - 8 hours.

16. Fine-tune the text, then prepare to load your Web page
    on your ISP - 40 minutes.

17. Accidentally delete your complete web page - 1 second.

18. Recreate your web page - 2 days.

19. Try to figure out how to load your Web page onto your
    ISP's server - 3 weeks.

20. Call a patient friend to find out about FTP - 30 minutes.

21. Download FTP software - 10 minutes.

22. Call your friend again - 15 minutes.

23. Upload your web page to your ISP's server - 10 minutes.

24. Connect to your site on the web - 1 minute.

25. Repeat any and all of the previous steps - eternity.

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                      humor                            1.94.3+
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