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Joke: May 14 - AOL's New Online Policy
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TODAY's JOKE
May 14, 1998
====================
RESULTS:
Yesterday's "Kids Say..." did reasonably well. Not great, but OK
Overall a 4.8 from Joke members
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===>STAR TREK TRIVIA, BEHIND THE SCENES ACTION AND MORE!<===
*******************************************************
Ever wonder how they film the Enterprise flying through space?
What was Riker's first assignment after graduating from Star Fleet
Academy? Do you know the registry number of the USS Voyager?
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AOL's NEW ONLINE POLICY
- Submitted by A. Smithson
------------------------------------
For those of you unfamiliar, America Online has adopted some
new policies. Here are some of their new reminder messages which
pop up frequently -depending on you rlevel of us.
1.You have been online for 46 minutes. Do you want to stay online?
Please respond within 10 minutes or you will be logged off.
2.You have been online for 92 minutes? Do you still want to stay
online?
Please respond within 10 minutes or you will be logged off.
>
3.You have been online for 135 minutes? Not to put any pressure
on you, but there are other people in the world who would like
to sign on.
4.You DO realize that you have been online for 184 minutes,
right? When was the last time that you were outside?
5.Ok, this is getting ridiculous! You have been online for 240
minutes. Frankly, you are beginning to piss us off. If you sign off
now, we will bring back your buddy list, ok?
6.You have now been online for 360 minutes. We promised you
unlimited time, we know, but can't you just finish up now and
go read a good book?
7.You have been online for 467 minutes. Do you remember
your family members' names?
8.You have been online for 513 minutes. Your spouse has left
you and your dog is starving. Do you wish to remain online?
9.You have been online for 724 minutes. Steve Case is
coming over to personally kick your butt.
10.You have been online for 852 minutes. Do you have ANY idea
how many HOURS that is?
11.You have been online for 921 minutes. Do you realize that
America Online averages 921 complaints per hour regarding busy
phone lines. That is because of YOU.! Now log off and go to bed!!
12.You have been online for 1000 minutes. When AOL went unlimited,
we didn't think you would take us literally. Now hang up!!!!!
13.You have been online since yesterday. If you don't log off, we
are coming over to your house and pulling your whole phone out of
the wall!! Thank you for being an AOL member. We appreciate your business.
PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR. Thanks
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