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[humorix] Humorix Announces Faux Dot Com Service
Humorix Announces Faux Dot Com Service
Press Release -- For Immediate Release
October 14, 1999
HUMORIX WORLD HEADQUARTERS -- /HypeNewsWire/ -- In an
effort to leverage its burgeoning portal website to gain
entry into the so-called "Astroturf Consulting" market,
Humorix World Domination, Inc. (NASDAQ: FAUX) announced
today a new subsidiary company called Faux Dot Com. The
primary service of Faux Dot Com is FauxFoo(tm), in which
sponsors can submit articles that will be presented on the
Faux portal website as unbiased market research reports
from the prestigious Faux consulting labs.
"FauxFoo represents the first competitive challenge to the
GartnerGroup in the Astroturf Consulting market. Up until
now, Gartner has had a monopoly on regurgitating
Microsoft press releases and presenting them as
independent, unbiased reports from Gartner's research
department," James Baughn, founder of Humorix said.
The power of the patent-pending FauxFoo(tm) system is
demonstrated in the following "independent" report
published today on the Faux Dot Com portal website:
LINUX BETTER THAN SLICED BREAD*
While the Windows family has some potential for growth, we
feel that Linux will achieve World Acceptance by 2004.
Core Topic: Hardware & Operating Systems:
Client-Operating-System Technologies Key Issues: How will
IBM, Microsoft, Novell, and Apple respond to Linux's vastly
superior qualities? How will the technology and markets
for client operating systems evolve during the next five
The concept of slided bread revolutionized the bakery
industry. In many ways, Linux represents a similar
revolution of the operating system market.
It is the opinion of Humorix/Faux Dot Com Labs that Linux
is simply better. Period. For instance, our research
indicates that Linux usage improves health and quality of
life for users. Headaches go away. Carpal tunnel injuries
heal. Allergic reactions aren't as bad. Eyesight
Our research also indicates that productivity for companies
that migrate from Windows to Linux can increase by as much
as 5100% over a two month span. Downtime is reduced by
34.5%. Employee sick days decrease by 29%. Karma increases
Bottom Line: Some wackos might claim that Linux is the
"hype du jour", but informed people know better. Windows
might continue to appeal to MCSEs and Microsoft stock
holders, but Linux, as it matures, will always appeal to a
much broader audience simply because it's better.
Faux Dot Com's Unix & Midrange Strategies Research Note
T-09-6969, 13 October 1999.
* This article is published by Red Hat. Additional
editorial material supplied by Faux Dot Com. © 1999.
Editorial supplied by Red Hat is independent of Faux
analysis and in no way should this information be construed
as a Faux endorsement of Red Hat's products and services.
Entire contents © 1999 by Faux. All rights reserved.
Reproduction of this publication in any form without prior
written permission is forbidden unless a sufficiently large
amount of money is deposited in our bank account. The
information contained herein has been obtained from sources
believed to be reliable. Faux disclaims all warranties as
to the accuracy, completeness or adequacy of such
information. Faux shall have no liability for errors,
omissions or inadequacies in the information contained
herein or for interpretations thereof. The reader assumes
sole responsibility for the selection of these materials to
achieve its intended results. The opinions expressed herein
are subject to change without notice.
A tentative rate schedule for FauxFoo is as follows:
* Single articles in favor of Linux: $100 per 1,000 words.
* Single articles in favor of other non-Microsoft products:
$150 per 1,000 words
* Single articles in favor of Microsoft products: $100,000
per 1,000 words.
October special: Sponsor three single articles, get one
Contact Ms. Ava Rice (email@example.com), Sales
Representative, for full details.
This press release brought to you by Say Hi to Hype Media
Relations, Inc. -- "We Buzz With Buzzwords(R)"
James S. Baughn
Humorix: Linux and Open Source(nontm) on a lighter note
Web site: http://www.i-want-a-website.com/about-linux/