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Fwd: Star Wars Vs. Titanic
TOP 15 REASONS WHY STAR WARS IS BETTER THAN TITANIC
15. Yoda could use the force to lift Titanic out of the water.
14. Leia is a princess, a senator, a freedom fighter, and Jedi material;
Rose is just marriage bait
13. Ewoks throw better parties than either First Class or Steerage
12. Titanic is egalitarian by portraying people as sympathetic characters.
Star Wars is egalitarian by promoting bug-eyed amphibians to Admiral.
11. We know Cal is the bad guy because he sneers at the poor and treats his
fiance like property. We know Darth Vader is the bad guy because he
strangles
people and blows up planets for fun.
10. Rose braves icy water to rescue her man. Leia braves Jabba the Hutt.
9. There are always enough escape pods in Star Wars.
8. Do you know what the empire does to self-proclaimed "kings of the world?"
7. "I'd rather be his whore than your wife," just doesnt' have the same sting
as, "I'd just as soon kiss a Wookie."
6. Han is frozan and turned into a wall ornament. Jack simply freezes.
5. Han Solo would have steered clear of that stupid iceberg!
4. We knew the boat was gonna sink, but who could've predicted, "Luke...I am
your father."?
3. Stormtroopers blast holes in stupid minor characters; everyone in
Titanic was a stupid
minor character.
2. When Star Wars was proclaimed the coolest movie of all time by half of
planet Earth, George Lucas did not make a dork of himself at the Oscars.
1. TITANIC MORALS:
a. gamble
b. cheat on your husband
c. pose nude for pictures
d. premarital sec is OK if you are infatuated.
STAR WARS MORALS:
a. fight evil
b. do good
c. respect all life even if it's ugly and slithers
d. rescue princess
e. save planet.