humor: may 21 -- Sabbath Stuff

[Nick Brown <nbrown@polymail.cpunix.calpoly.edu>]

=======================================================================
                              Nick's G-Rated Humor List
=======================================================================

Traditional Jews and Reformed Jews
==================================
Some tidbits from David Bader's
"How to Be an Extremely Reformed Jew".
	--- forwarded by Whattadeal@aol.com


Trad'l:  One set of dishes for meat, another set for dairy.

Reform:  One set of dishes exclusively for cheeseburgers.


Trad'l:  Hire "shabbos goy" to perform religiously prohibited tasks.

Reform:  Hire "Orthodox Jew" to perform religiously required tasks.


Trad'l: Will not combine meat with milk.

Reform:  Will not combine meat with chocolate milk.


	Jewish men have been wearing sacred round
	skullcaps since ancient times, possibly to
	hide male pattern baldness.


Jewish Year: Current year plus 3760.
Jewish Dog Year:  Current year plus 3760, multiply by 7.


==========================================================
From: Just 4 Laughs Humor List <FAQ-J4L@lyris.enlist.com>

Career Choice

An acquaintance of mine who is a physician told this story about her
then four year old daughter.  On the way to preschool, the doctor had
left her stethoscope on the car seat, and her little girl picked it up
and began playing with it.  Be still,  my heart, thought my friend, my
daughter wants to follow in my footsteps!

Then the child spoke into the instrument:
"Welcome to McDonald's.  May I take you order?"

=======================================
Did you hear about the guy who lost
his left arm and leg in a car crash?
  There's not much LEFT of him ...
  .... but he's all RIGHT now!
=======================================

 =======================================================================
 ARCHIVES OF PAST ISSUES: http://www.NicksHumor.net/archive
 =======================================================================
 Thanks for telling your friends about this humor list.
 Send G-Rated submissions to: submit@NicksHumor.net
=======================================================================
TO SUBSCRIBE:
 Send an e-mail message to: request@NicksHumor.net
 In the body of the message (no subject required) type: subscribe
 Do not type any other words.
=======================================================================
TO UNSUBSCRIBE:
 Send an e-mail message to: request@NicksHumor.net
 In the body of the message (no subject required) type: unsubscribe
 Do not type any other words.
=======================================================================
TO SWITCH TO DIGEST VERSION OF LIST:
 Send an e-mail message to: request@NicksHumor.net
 In the body of the message (no subject required) type: set digest
 Do not type any other words.
 You will receive 1 message per week with all jokes from previous week.
=======================================================================
 To report trouble with list send to: help@NicksHumor.net
=======================================================================
                      humor                            1.94.3+
=======================================================================