humor: Diet Delights

[Eric Thelin <eric@generation-i.com>]

Last summer, frozen food companies had trouble finding qood-quality
vegetables for processing. because of the dry weather. As a result,
many were culled but few were frozen.   Hee, hee, hee.

There are Diets and There are Diets

*  A diet is a weigh of life.

*  It's something most of us do religiously:  We eat what
   we want and pray we don't gain weight.

*  A diet is what you go on when not only can't you fit
   into the store's dresses, you can't fit into the dressing room.

*  One guideline applies to fat and thin people alike:
   If you're thin, don't eat fast.
   If you're fat, don't eat...fast.

*  The problem with curbing our appetites is that most of
   us do it at the drive in window of McDonalds.

*  The most fattening thing you can put in an ice cream
   sundae is a spoon.

*  The biggest drawback to fasting for seven days is that it
   makes one weak.

*  Above all, dieters are advised to avoid Pepsi, the pause
   that refleshes.

*  Sweets are the destiny that shapes our ends.

*  Diets are for people who are thick and tired of it.

*  The toughest part of a diet isn't watching what you eat.
   It's watching what other people eat.

*  A diet is when you have to go to some length to change
   your width.

*  It's not the minutes spent at the table that put on
   weight, it's the seconds.

*  People go to Weight Watchers to learn their lessens.

*  A diet is the modern-day meal in which a family counts
   its calories instead of its blessings.