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July 24 - WINDOWS ERRORS in HAIKU
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TODAY's JOKE
July 24 , 1998
====================
RESULTS:
Yesterday's Carnival Cruise jokes received mix grades
depending whether you had ever been on a cruise ship before
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WINDOWS ERRORS in HAIKU
- Submitted by Bill Carmody
------------------------------------
In the wake of the Federal anti-trust suit against Microsoft,
Sony has announced its own computer operating system now
available on its hot new portable PC called the Vaio.
Instead of producing the cryptic error messages characteristic
of Microsoft's Windows 95, 3.1, and DOS operating systems,
Sony's chairman Asai Tawara said, "We intend to capture the high
ground by putting a human, Japanese face on what has been -- until
now an operating system that reflects Western cultural hegemony.
For example, we have replaced the usual impersonal and unhelpful
Microsoft error messages with our own Japanese haiku poetry."
The chairman went on to give examples of Sony's new error
messages:
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
A file that big?
It might be very useful.
But now it is gone.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
The Web site you seek
cannot be located but
endless others exist
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Chaos reigns within.
Reflect, repent, and reboot.
Order shall return.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
ABORTED effort:
Close all that you have.
You ask way too much.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
First snow, then silence.
This thousand dollar screen dies
so beautifully.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
With searching comes loss
and the presence of absence:
"My Novel" not found.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
The Tao that is seen
Is not the true Tao, until
You bring fresh toner.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Windows NT crashed.
I am the Blue Screen of Death.
No one hears your screams.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Rather than a beep
Or a rude error message,
These words: "File not found."
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Serious error.
All shortcuts have disappeared.
Screen. Mind. Both are blank.
PLEASE VISIT OUR SPONSOR. Thanks
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