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Joke: April 2 - It's all a matter of degree



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                               TODAY's JOKE
                              April 2,  1998
                           ====================
RESULTS: 
Thanks for all your great comments to us about our April Fools
edition. And thanks for the checks. We'll be donating the funds 
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                      WHAT A DIFFERENCE A DEGREE MAKES             
                      - Submitted by Amikam Raz
                  ------------------------------------  
   For those scientifically inclined. To convert Celcius to Fahrenheit
   C x 9/5 + 32. Or Fahrenheit to Celcius   = F - 32 x 5/9
   For those humor inclined, have fun :)
C    F
--  --
15   60   Californians put on sweaters (if they can find one).
10   50   Miami residents turn on the heat.
4    45   New Hampshire residents go to outdoor concerts.
2    40   You can see your breath; Californians shiver
          uncontrollably;Minnesotans go swimming.
1.5  35   Italian cars don't start.
0.5  33   Swedes celebrate summer and hit the beaches topless
0    32   Water freezes
-1   30   You plan your vacation to Australia.
-4   25   Ohio water freezes; Californians weep pitiably; Minnesotans 
          eat ice cream; Canadians go swimming.
-6   20   Politicians begin to talk about the homeless; New York City   
          water freezes; Miami residents plan vacation further south.
-10  15   French cars don't start; Cat insists on sleeping in your 
          bed with you.
-12  10   You need jumper cables to get the car going.
-15   5   American cars don't start.
-18   0   Alaskans put on T-Shirts.
-23  -10  German cars don't start; Eyes freeze shut when you blink.
-26  -15  You can cut your breath and use it to build an igloo; 
          Arkansans stick tongue on metal objects; 
          Miami residents cease to exist.
-29  -20  Cat insists on sleeping in pajamas with you; Politicians 
          actually do something about the homeless; Minnesotans shovel 
          snow off roof; Japanese cars don't start.
-32  -25  Too cold to think; You need jumper cables to get the driver going.
-34  -30  You plan a two week hot bath; Swedish cars don't start.
-38  -38  Californians disappear; Minnesotans button top button; 
          Canadians put on sweaters; Scientests around the world celebrate
          sincee Fahrenheit and Celcius thermometers finally match.
-45  -50  Congressional hot air freezes; Alaskans close the bathroom window.
          You car helps you plan your trip south (Or North if you love 
          in the Southern Hemnisphere)
-62  -80  Hell freezes over; Polar bears move south; 
           Green Bay Packer fans order hot cocoa at the game.
-67  -90  Lawyers put their hands in their own pockets.
-68  -91  Life ceases.

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