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humor: jun 13 -- Sunday Stuff



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                              Nick's G-Rated Humor List
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When you are young, you want to be the
master of your fate and the captain of
your soul.  When you're older, you'll
settle for being the master of your
weight and the captain of your bowling
team.


Quotes by the Famous (and not so famous)
""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""""
 Selected from a larger collection sent
 by andychaps_the-funnies-owner@egroups.com

*We are what we repeatedly do.  Excellence
 is therefore not an act, but a habit.
	  - Aristotle

*You shall judge of a man by his foes
 as well as by his friends.
	  - Joseph Conrad

*The greatest weakness of most humans is
 their hesitancy to tell others how much
 they love them while they're still alive.
	    - O. A. Battista

*Get your facts first, and then you
 can distort 'em as you please.
	   - Mark Twain

*He that has done you a kindness
 will be more ready to do you another,
 than he whom you yourself have obliged.
	  - Benjamin Franklin

*The best portion of a good man's
 life is his little, nameless,
 unremembered acts of kindness and love.
	  - William Wordsworth



==================================
Phill M. offers some thoughts
concerning the left arm/leg jokes...

I heard about the guy who lost his left arm and leg in a car crash.
Off handed, I would say he was left out. However, I still do not
think he was right at the time.

AND concerning the 'other side'
   They do not seem truly right. I have to say they are a little off
handed. I think it is bias that you LEFT out the people who have lost
their right arm and leg?? They can not be left out!! I think we should
put them right in there and tell jokes off-handely about their detachment
from what was once right and talk about what's left.

    __ _
   /_/\/\    'Let us consider how we may spur one
   \ \  /    another on towards love and good deeds.'
   /_/  \
   \_\/\ \          Hebrews 10:34
      \_\/



=============================  SERIOUS STUFF

For Your Inspiration:

As you sit in your house
you hear a sound.
You search for the source,
at the front door it's found.

You open the door and
there stands a man
that you've never met,
with a checkbook in hand.

He says, "Go gather your bills
and add them today.
I have this checkbook,
and I'd like to pay."

You pause for a moment.
This cannot be real.
But you would be foolish
to not take this deal.

Now here's the surprise
this story is true!
The door's not in your house,
it's inside of you.

The 'debt' is your sin
that you carry around.
But Jesus will pay it,
now how does that sound?

Yes, a check he will write
with salvation's pen.
There's a knock at your door,
won't you let him in?
	--Author Unknown

Posted From:  Randy Walker ... who sent it to
andychaps_the-funnies@egroups.com ... who sent it to me.
========================================================

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                      humor                            1.94.3+
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