humor: nov 20 -- Saturday Puns

[Nick Brown <nbrown@polymail.cpunix.calpoly.edu>]

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What saint chased the snakes out of Ireland three times?
St. Hat-Trick 			(Cynthia MacGregor)


	Photons have mass?
	I didn't even know they were Catholic.

	A barbershop quartet's favorite vegetable?
	Four-part hominy.

	"Can't you dig that hole any deeper?"
	asked Tom, pitifully.


Book of the Week:
	White's novel about a morally bankrupt but very
	successful Chinese chef who becomes very popular by
	including pastel food coloring in many of his dishes.
		The Wanton Fuschia King
			(By Gary Hallock)


Gary Hallock:

	What color is the Peter Lorre?
		Minnie Drivers prefer a Vanna White.
	But what made Mary Pickford?
		A bad experience with Maurice Chevalier.
	Because she couldn't make his Chevy Chase?
		Not as fast as George Wendt
	Then I guess she got rid of Vicki Carr?
		Same place Bert Parks
	She did that pretty quickly. Is she a Fess Parker?
		Yeah, you ought to see how fast she can Parker Brothers


WITH APOLOGIES TO PETER, PAUL AND MARY
My Uncle Jim did not appear to be much for words. But he had an ant farm.
He loved the tiny creatures and knew more about them than anyone. One day
tragedy struck in the form of a very high wind which blew the top off the
ant farm.  Suddenly his creatures were gone. In tears, he called me to
report,
	"The ants are my friends.
	 They're blowing in the wind.
	 The ants are blowing in the wind!"

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
  Taken from the GROANERS mailings
  of Stan Kegel <kegel@fea.net>
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::


GETTING EVEN ...
A.R. comments on yesterday's statement
<< By the way, the previous all-even
date was way back in 8/8/888 >>

	"Maybe you meant 8/28/888"
Well maybe I did!  I can't find the AP
clipping now. So ...... uh yes, I did.  Thanks A.R.
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              humor                            1.94.3+ 9908
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