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humor: oct 11 -- Pun Atack!



                              Nick's G-Rated Humor List

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
  Taken from the GROANERS mailings
  of Stan Kegel <kegel@fea.net>
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BOOK TITLES

	"One Flaky Life" By Dan Druff
			(Dave Coble)

	A Beginner's Guide to Stand-Up Comedy by Joe King
			(Scott Ryan) Gary Hallock

	My Life as a Midget   by Summer Lyttle
			(Cynthia MacGregor)

	Little Gordon's dad had been promising for years that
	he could have a hunting bow when he turned 12. On his
	birthday he unwrapped his gift box revealing the long-
	sought-for bow. Yet Gordon was still disappointed. "But
	Dad, where are the arrows?" His cautious father replied,
	"I never promised you arrows, Gordon."
						(Gary Hallock)

	"It's Drafty" by Isadora Jarr
				(Asa Sparks)

	What is the title of the famous novel
	about rodents & spices?
		Of Mice Cinnamon
			(Gary Hallock)


T.V. Shows of the Week:

	Alan Alda stars in a show about his
	preferred culinary preparation of potatoes.
		M*A*S*H*E*D (By Cynthia MacGregor)


Song of the Week:
	Hurricane in Florida just after
	you buy a new satellite dish.
		"Don't Fly from Me Large Antenna
				(Ken Pinkham)

ON MONEY by Gary Hallock:

	How much will Jim Backus?
	Nothing. All his Cassius Clay
	But how much did Bruce Willis?
	Not enough to make any Buddy Rich.
	I'll bet he didn't leave Bo Diddley
	Did he leave Mike Nichols?
	Yes, and he gave Desmond Tutu
	Tutu got two! Then maybe Woody Guthrie?
	He might. I know he gave Eddie Money
	But did he also give Robert DeNiro?
	That must have made Robert a Little Richard
	No, That was Richard, Nixon
	You mean Rich Little?
	No, he was the one who gave Johnny Cash.
	Didn't that leave Edgar Allan Poe?
	Yes, after he paid Will Durant.


Are you Haydn?
	Yes, but I'll be Bach.
			(Jim Ertner)

EXTRA!!! EXTRA!!!
	The local zoo had a new-born baby bear,
	so the newspaper sent over a cub reporter.


Cub reporter, get it!
Enjoy the week, gang.
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              humor                            1.94.3+ 9908