Joke: Heber and the Pope

[Eric Thelin <eric@generation-i.com>]

Many years ago, the Pope decided that all the Mormons had
to leave Rome. Naturally, there was a big uproar from the
Mormon community. So, the Pope made a deal. He would have a
religious debate with a member of the Mormon community. If
the Mormon won, the Mormons could stay. If the Pope won, the
Mormons would leave. Realizing they had no choice, the
Mormons picked a young missionary from Idaho [probably Malad] named
Heber
to represent them.

Not able to speak Italian very well, Heber asked for one
addition to the debate. To make it more interesting, neither
side could talk. The Pope agreed.

The day of the great debate came. Heber and the Pope sat
opposite each other for a full minute before the Pope raised
his hand and showed three fingers. Heber looked back at him
and raised one finger. The Pope waved his fingers in a
circle around his head. Heber pointed to the ground where he
sat. The Pope pulled out a wafer and a glass of wine. Heber
pulled out an apple.

The Pope stood up and said, "I give up! This man is too
good. The Mormons can stay."

Afterwards, the Cardinals, gathered around the Pope, asked
him to explain what had happened.  The Pope said, "First, I
held up three fingers to represent the Trinity. He responded
by holding up one finger to remind me that there was still
one God common to both our religions., Then I waved my
finger around me to show him that God was all around us. He
responded by pointing to the ground and showing that God was
also right here with us. I pulled out the wine and wafer to
show that God absolves us from our sins. He pulled out an
apple to remind me of the original sin. He had an answer for
everything. What could I do?"

Meanwhile the Mormon community and all the missionaries
had crowed around Heber. "What happened?" they asked.

"Well," said Heber, "first he said to me that the Mormons
had three days to get out of here. I told him that not one
of us was leaving. He told me that his whole city would be
cleared of Mormons. I let him know we were staying right
here."

"And then?" asked a woman.

"I don't know," said Heber, "he took out his lunch and I
took out mine."