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computers in the movies (fwd)
---------- Forwarded message ----------
Date: Mon, 27 Oct 1997 13:08:53 -0700
From: Janet Sullivan <email@example.com>
To: Arthur Dent <firstname.lastname@example.org>, Brian Cluff <email@example.com>
Subject: Fw: computers in the movies (fwd)
>Next year's senior design project is to make all of these things a reality!
>25 interesting things that you learn about computers in the movies...
>1. Word processors never display a cursor.
>2. You never have to use the spacebar when typing long sentences.
>3. All monitors display 2 inch high letters.
>4. High-tech computers, such as those used by NASA, the CIA, or
>some such governmental institution, have easy-to-understand graphical
>5. Those that don't will have incredibly powerful text-based
>command shells that can correctly understand and execute commands
>typed in plain English.
>6. Corollary: You can gain access to any information you want by
>simply typing "ACCESS ALL OF THE SECRET FILES" on any keyboard.
>7. Likewise, you can infect a computer with a destructive virus
>by simply typing "UPLOAD VIRUS." Viruses cause temperatures in
>computers, just like they do in humans. After a while, smoke
>billows out of disk drives and monitors.
>8. All computers are connected. You can access the information on the
>villain's desktop computer, even if it's turned off.
>9. Powerful computers beep whenever you press a key or whenever
>the screen changes. Some computers also slow down the output on
>the screen so that it doesn't go faster than you can read. The
>*really* advanced ones also emulate the sound of a dot-matrix
>printer as the characters come across the screen.
>10. All computer panels have thousands of volts and flash pots
>just underneath the surface. Malfunctions are indicated by a bright
>flash, a puff of smoke, a shower of sparks, and an explosion that
>forces you backward. See #7, above)
>11. People typing away on a computer will turn it off without
>saving the data.
>12. A hacker can get into the most sensitive computer in the world
>before intermission and guess the secret password in two tries.
>13. Any PERMISSION DENIED has an OVERRIDE function.
>14. Complex calculations and loading of huge amounts of data will be
>accomplished in under three seconds. In the movies, modems transmit
>data at two gigabytes per second.
>15. When the power plant/missile site/whatever overheats, all the
>control panels will explode, as will the entire building.
>16. If you display a file on the screen and someone deletes the
>file,it also disappears from the screen. There are no ways to copy a
>backup file-and there are no undelete utilities.
>17. If a disk has got encrypted files, you are automatically asked
>for a password when you try to access it.
>18. No matter what kind of computer disk it is, it'll be readable by
>any system you put it into. All application software is usable by all
>19. The more high-tech the equipment, the more buttons it has.
>However, everyone must have been highly trained, because the buttons
>20. Most computers, no matter how small, have reality-defying
>three-dimensional, real-time, photo-realistic animated graphics
>21. Laptops, for some strange reason, always seem to have amazing
>real-time video phone capabilities and the performance of a CRAY- MP.
>22. Whenever a character looks at a VDU, the image is so bright
>that it projects itself onto his/her face.
>23. Computers never crash during key, high-intensity activities.
>Humans operating computers never make mistakes under stress.
>24. Programs are fiendishly perfect and never have bugs that slow
>25. Any photograph can have minute details pulled out of it. You can
>zoom into any picture as far as you want to. For example: "What's
>that fuzzy thing in the corner? I don't know, let's check.
>Ken Collier, Ph.D.
>Box 15600 e-mail: Ken.Collier@nau.edu
>College of Engineering and Technology Phone: 520-523-5412
>Northern Arizona University Fax: 520-523-2300
>Flagstaff, Arizona 86011-1560 WWW: http://www.cse.nau.edu/~kwc